Bad Theism

Bad Theism: Apocalyptic Mindset

For the last Bad Theism, click here: Bad Theism: Presuppositional Apologetics

Just to let everyone know I hadn’t really planned on writing another Bad Theism article tonight. I had actually intended on writing a blog about apophenia. If you don’t know, apophenia is how humans will take two completely unrelated occurrences and yet somehow come up with a way that these two things are connected. That’s a fairly simple description and one day soon I will write more on the topic, however, tonight I decided to write about people who wish for the end of the world.


Apocalyptic prophecies are not the monopoly of the Christian faith and yet since Christianity is the faith that I know the most about, having been a minister for a decade, it will be the faith I deal with the most tonight. Islam, Hinduism, and even New Age Spirituality have their own versions of the coming end of mankind’s reign on the earth. Judaism on the other hand both does and does not have a coming apocalypse….pick a side people! lol

Anyway, the first thing that I want to say is that the vast majority of believers which I have met do not actually wish to see the world come to an end. They will however speak as if they are excitedly awaiting the apocalypse. When I was a Christian minister i would have told you about the glorious return of Christ that could happen every minute and then the horrific things that would occur after the church had been raptured. I would have spoken to you in such a way that you honestly believed I wished for the world to end and yet always in the back of my mind I hoped to have a long life that would end long before the supposed rapture was to occur.

My story is not that unique. I actually used to preach on the idea that most of us don’t really want to see the world to come to an end or else we wouldn’t spend so much time and money attempting to continue our existence here on earth. My grandfather is the type that believes any prediction about the end of the world, Y2K, 2012, the election last year…..all were definitely going to be the end of the world. I believe his latest prediction is that the end of the world will happen sometime in August, and yet he planned a family reunion for September….you can literally see the cognitive dissonance dripping off of him.


Anyway, my grandfather is this rapture groupie and yet he has spent thousands of dollars and numerous medical procedures in order to prolong his life here on Earth. He had his prostate removed because it was cancerous, has had a couple of stints put into his heart to keep the blood flowing, had surgery to stop a brain bleed after a fall a couple of years back, and he has spent an unimaginable amount of money on vitamins and supplements to keep his eyes strong and his coat extra shiny. Now…wouldn’t you think if he was that eager to see god that he would see any of the issues that have plagued him as an express ticket to the throne of judgment?  You’d think that but the truth is he actually desperately wants to live as long as possible.


What is there to explain this?

Somewhere in his mind is a sane and rational portion that sees death as the end and doesn’t actively celebrate the idea of the end of time.  I base this on my own experience when I too was someone who outwardly wished for the end of the world while inwardly wanted to ward it off for as long as I could. Now sure this is anecdotal but I’m only mentioning it because I want to point out that the believer and the belief are not always synonymous. It seems strange but a person can be fully 100% in a death cult and yet not wish death and destruction on anyone.

I think one of the interesting pieces of evidence is the fact that in order to explain the end of the world, judgement, and hell the believer will simply throw his hands in the air and state that god is supreme and that he has a better knowledge of life in general than any human could. Death, hell, and the end of the world are not evil, they are simply things that we don’t understand because we are dumb. Now why do I say this is evidence? I say this because it is the ultimate example of throwing someone under the bus and eliminating the problem from your own psyche.

Let’s replace “god” with Dave…

Person A: Hey, did you know Dave is going to return and destroy the world soon.
Person B: Why would Dave do that?
Person A: I don’t know, it’s Dave…
Person B: Dave seems to be a prick.
Person A: Hey, Dave’s in upper management and knows things, are you, a lowly janitor, really going to question Dave?
Person B: I guess not but it still doesn’t make much sense.
Person A: Well, Dave does work in mysterious ways…

Anyway, my point being is that the believer throws these ideas into the lap of god so that they don’t have to deal with it in their own mind and can continue on with their vitamin and supplement regimens while still pretending to excitedly wait for Dave’s return.

The next question that we face is why do believers have to live in this constant state of cognitive dissonance?

adam and eve
“The Fall and Expulsion from Garden of Eden” depiction of Adam and Eve in the Sistine Chapel by Michelangelo. Photo courtesy of Creative Commons/Sebastian Bergmann

The answer to that is their faith is a death cult. Let’s lay this out for you…

  • Adam and Eve sinned which brought death to the world.
  • For generations men had to sacrifice animals in order to keep gods wrath at bay.
  • Jesus came to earth for the sole purpose of dying in a brutal sacrificial way.
  • Peace and Love can only reign once the final death-blow is dealt and all sinners are done away with in a horrifically gruesome way.

Now I say their faith is but I still promote the idea that the believer is likely not in on the want for death to come to the world and destroy all of their friends and family who don’t happen to be a part of the faith. The majority of Christians and Muslims are good people not because of their faith but in spite of their faith. Both Christianity and Islam share the idea of eternal punishment for the sinner and so it is very hard for the believer to accept this truth.

Think of it….

Grandma, who bakes me cookies but doesn’t go to church is going to hell. What kind of torture is that to put on the mind? I can tell you that as a child I was deeply scared that people I knew would end up in hell and yet the older I got the less I thought about it and the more I threw my hands in the air and simply said, “Well….it must be true since it says it is and so….whatever…” That might seem a bit cold but what I mean is that I simply did not think about it all that much because it wasn’t something that I enjoyed thinking about.

Now the last question I want to touch upon is why do these faiths feel the need to promote the idea of an apocalypse?

Simply put, these faiths need some sort of grand finale for people to actually continue following them. Sure there are liberal forms of Christianity but for the most part these are just agnostics that lack the guts to admit it. You have to have the big pay-off at the end or else why would anyone follow the faith?

Think about it, religion is an absolute chore. A bunch of arbitrary rules that don’t really make sense that you have to follow in order to please god….it fucking sucks. However, with the threat of hell and the coming apocalypse, you can keep enough people on the “straight and narrow” in order to keep the lights on, buy a golden staff, and ride around in a weird bubble car. If you take radical Islam, do you really think you could get anyone to blow themselves up if this was all there was and there wasn’t some grand payday in the end? For the fundamentalist faiths you must have some sort of horrific end to keep people from leaving your garbage faith. For me this was definitely true, since when I really started to look into the origins of hell, I began to no longer fear it, and so leaving the faith no longer held the fear that it once had in my mind.

So in conclusion, I want to point out once again that even though these faiths are most definitely death cults, their adherents are not necessarily of the same mindset. The vast majority of believers say one thing while thinking another, we all want a good life and for the most part we all want a long life. Our faiths may teach one thing but in the end we are all human and just want to live our lives in peace and as fear free as possible.


Bonus: New Age Apocalypse

So perhaps one of the funniest things that I find in the New Age beliefs is how horribly wrong their predictions can be and how they explain the failure of their predictions. It seems that at least once per month the new age crowd is predicting something that is going to take humans to the next step in evolution, when we will transcend our physical bodies and enter in to the 5th, 6th, or 45th dimension. What is going to bring about this change? Well, it could be…


The Super Moon
A Blood Moon
A Blue Moon
An Alignment of any number of the planets
A Cool numbered day….11/11/11 anyone?
The First Day of Fall
The First Day of Spring
The Winter Solstice
The Summer Solstice
Venus appearing in the sky
and of course NIBIRU!!!!!!

When the transformation doesn’t occur it is ultimately granted to one of two things.

1.) Too many low-frequency humans infesting the earth.
2.) A Paradigm Shift

So it’s either that there are way too many shitty people who haven’t gotten “WOKE” yet, that it was really just a change of thinking that occurred, or a combination of the two. Whenever one of these things happen I like to imagine Star Wars, and instead of the force actually working it ends up with Luke simply thinking differently about the empire and going on with his life. Not a great idea for a movie because it’s just a lazy way to explain away things that were never going to occur in the first place.  That won’t stop them from trying….cause remember….the next blood moon will mark the return of Nibiru and the Nordics are going to save us from the reptilian overlords who are all turning the freaking frogs gay…