Unmasking Doctrine

Unmasking Doctrine #5: Deity of Christ: Miracles

Good evening heathens and hell-bound friends and foes alike! Tonight marks another adventure into the world of Assemblies of God doctrine. For the last in this series, click here: Unmasking Doctrine #4: Deity of Christ: Sinless Life. Tonight will be a shorter article because it’s a pretty simplistic thing to grasp.

The Scriptures used by the Assembly to support this doctrine are as follows:

shrugged

So do the miracles of Jesus as written about in the Gospels prove that he was the son of god? No, simply because there is no real proof that any of these stories are true whatsoever. I find myself as a mythicist, believing that the stories about a wandering minister could come from a conglomeration of tales put together into the persona of a single man. I don’t trust that there ever was an actual person who fit all the characteristics of the gospels and I definitely don’t believe that he worked wonders and miracles as is taught in the gospels. I have no faith in any of these.

The reasoning for this is that the miracles come in the forms of either:

A.) Preposterous
B.) Illusions

Zombie_Pigman.png

In the preposterous category we have:

  1. Casting Demons into pigs
  2. The Loaves and Fishes
  3. Curing blindness with spit and mud

 

 

 

 

PennTeller_Side_by_side_11223_004.jpg

In the illusion category we have:

  1. Turning water into wine
  2. Fish with a coin in its mouth
  3. Causing a lame man to walk

The reason that I state these are either preposterous or Illusion is that the first category are things which are so far out that there would definitely be other corroborating evidence of these miracles outside the bible. A guy turns 5 loaves and 2 fish is something that is going to appear in every local village writing in the area. A cow is born with two heads today and the entire world knows before the next morning, there is no doubt in my mind that the authorities would have kept records of these supposed miracles.

The second category is illusions that a magician today could choose to do if they set their mind to it. Especially the last one that I mention. Every con man worth their weight in salt has had the ability to make a lame man walk…charlatans have traveled the globe committing this fraud. All you need is for a person to pretend to be lame, say some mumbo jumbo to them, and then have them go “walking and leaping and praising god..”

The real problem I have here is that if we are to accept that Jesus is the son of god because of the miracles written about him in the bible, then we would also have to accept any other tale including miracles occurring. Mohammad must have actually pt319.jpgtransported to Jerusalem or else it wouldn’t have been written in the Qu’ran. Krishna really did lift a mountain and balance it on his pinky because it’s written that he did. I really do have a foot-long penis because I just wrote that I have a foot-long penis.

The main basis against these claims is that they are simply claims with no evidence to actually support them. You can’t believe everything that is written on the internet and this has been true no matter what medium is being used to convey the message. People lie on the internet, they lie on tv, newspapers, radio, books, pamphlets, papyrus and even cuneiform were written with lies included. People tell tall tales and the longer they are told the bigger the tales get.

I’ll admit that it is slightly possible that there might have been a man named Yeshua, who ministered in the area, and had people claim that he performed many signs and wonders. I’ll admit that today there was a man named Osho, who ministered, and his followers claim many signs and wonders were performed by him. However I do not claim any faith in any of the wonders or miracles that either of these two people are claimed to have performed.

And if you don’t believe me…here is what President Lincoln had to say on the matter…

lincoln

 

2 thoughts on “Unmasking Doctrine #5: Deity of Christ: Miracles

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